One day toward the end of spring, I received an e-mail notification that said Pam Stenzel would be speaking on abstinence at our local high school. Immediately I knew this was something that would be beneficial to my children, two high school age sons and a middle-school age daughter. The purpose of the talk was to to challenge and inspire today's youth to understand the values of personal responsibility, self discipline and character.
As a psychologist, mother, single parent, and pro-life advocate, I know very well the challenges of raising three children in a culture that does not value morality, chastity, and self mastery as much as it values self-centeredness, materialism, and disobedience. Our society has been lured by the global marketing machine into ignorance of what is of real value to our mortal and eternal lives. We tend to seek the roads most appealing to our fallen human nature, often the easiest roads possible, and we buy many lies, literally and figuratively. The consequences for ourselves and for others are eternal, and that is why we should care, starting immediately.
We will not acquire morality unless we practice morality, and the name of Pam's presentation immediately set the tone for the evening: Sex Has A Price Tag. Our culture would be wise to value chastity, purity, modesty, loyalty, and abstinence, because we as individuals, and members of families, communities, nations, and a global community all benefit when they are encouraged and practiced. We value morality when we have a close and personal relationship with God. Establishing close union with Him and following His Commandments are the very best choice each of us can possibly make now, ever, forever.
The night of the event we drove to the school, wondering what to expect. Friends and I had spoken over the phone earlier and pooled our knowledge, but still were not quite sure exactly what would be discussed and what ages the talk would be appropriate for.
I made the decision to take all three of my children with me. As we walked from the parking lot to the school auditorium the evening of the event, I scanned the people who were also making their way to the building. The crowd consisted mostly of parents, but there were also a good number of high schoolers. We did not see any children who were my middle school daughter's age. Still not knowing what to expect, I joked with Alyssa as we continued toward the school, "Walk taller!"
Wow, did Pam deliver! As she said many times that night, she has heard it from young people so many times through the years: "I wish someone had told me." Knowledge is empowering, and she sure empowered the audience. I laughed, took lots of notes, and several times was moved to tears by what Pam said. She challenged parents to love their children and equip them with the truth. What a rarity it is to go to a public place and hear so much truth spoken with such candor and caring.
We LOVED every minute of it! So did every other parent I spoke with after Pam's presentation. If only her words were brought to every middle school and high school and into every home. If only.
Our society is in the midst of a colossal, unprecedented moral crisis. Repercussions from the immoral behavior of people of all ages are being felt around the entire world, and our spiritual, emotional, and physical welfare is being affected. We are morally responsible for teaching our children right from wrong, and it is also our moral responsibility as parents and grandparents to be living witnesses of holiness for our children and also for countless others. As Pam stated so poignantly, it is the parent's job to parent their children, and the current generation of parents is dropping the ball, seriously.
The problem is so many people no longer know the truth from the lies marketed to us by companies that are making a lot of money selling us products that promise us results without responsibility. From the pharmaceutical companies to contraceptive manufacturers and providers to the abortion industry, we are being conned into believing that irresponsible behavior leads to happiness and if we literally buy their lies, we can behave any way we choose and no one will get hurt. The truth is that people do get hurt, some of the consequences are permanent, and businesses profit financially from our ignorance.
As Pam said, "If you have sex outside of marriage, you will pay." Several times she reinforced the fact that as far as relationships go, ultimately "You get what you are." She also reminded us "You can't take back an abortion, " informed us that "Abortion doesn't fix anything, it destroys people; contraception doesn't always avoid pregnancy, and it doesn't prevent disease."
She immediately pointed out that many people focus on a potential pregnancy when considering sex outside of marriage, while a colossal risk factor is not even considered (often because people incorrectly believe that artificial contraception can prevent them): acquiring a sexually transmitted disease. These diseases make people sick, people spread them unaware and also aware that they have them, they can lead to infertility, some of them cannot be cured, and some of them are fatal. Yes, sex can come with a very heavy price tag, and so many people, young and not-so-young, have never learned the information they need to make the right choices.
Sex Has A Price Tag should be shown in every middle school, high school, and college, regularly.
From her official website, http://www.pamstenzel.com :
Pam Stenzel, Founder of ENLIGHTEN COMMUNICATIONS Inc., tackles today’s tough issues of sex with candor, insight, humor, and the challenge for young people to get the abstinence advantage. Pam has traveled worldwide, speaking in person to over 500,000 young people each year about issues of sexuality and the importance of abstinence - her videos are viewed by millions worldwide. Pam also holds seminars with parents and educators regarding issues of teen sex and how vital character building is in a child’s upbringing.
Meet Pam. You'll be glad you did!
Drawing from her personal story, as well as her visits with teens around the world, Pam talks about the consequences-both physical and emotional-of sex outside of marriage. It’s been her experience that, if given the facts, today’s young people are fully capable of making good, healthy decisions.
For years, Pam was on the "front lines" as Director of Alpha Women’s Center, a counseling center for women undergoing crisis pregnancies. Her experiences taught her that before teen pregnancy and STD rates could decline, attitudes of teens toward sex first had to change. Desiring to bring about that change, Pam started speaking nationally full-time and is in great demand both in the U.S.A. and in other countries such as Mexico, Australia, Ireland, and Canada.
Degree in Psychology from Liberty University
Served as member, National Abstinence Clearinghouse Advisory Board
Served as Director of the Alpha Women’s Center, a crisis pregnancy center in Prior lake, MN
Developed numerous abstinence education products. "Sex Has a Price Tag- the Original" video is distributed worldwide and has been translated in 11 different languages.
Received the Charleston International Film Festival Gold Award in 1997 for her video "Sex Has a Price Tag- the Original"
Pam Stenzel’s public school curriculum "Abstinence by choice" and "Building Healthy Relationships" is used worldwide in North and South America, Australia,
Hong Kong, Singapore, Africa and Ireland
Video curriculum, "Sex, Love and Relationships", received the Crown Award for Curriculum of the Year, in 1999
Pam participated in President Bush’s Faith-Based and Community Initiatives meeting held at The White House, May 2001
Featured speaker at the United Nations for "The Summit on Children Conference", June 2001
Guest appearances on national television and radio programs include: Fox News Networks, "Hannity & Colmes Show", "The Dr. Laura Show", CBN’s "The 700 Club", and ABC Televisions "Politically Incorrect with Bill Maher".
Seven years ago Pam Stenzel grew weary of hearing the phrase, NOBODY TOLD ME!! After years of counseling young girls who found themselves in crisis pregnancies, Pam began to realize that so many were completely unaware of the risks involved with sexual activity, and that many had never been told about all the consequences of their choices. That was the inception of Pam's life as a speaker, but Pam Stenzel's story started years earlier.
In 1964 a fifteen-year-old girl was raped, became pregnant, and decided to carry her unborn child to term. Five months after the baby girl was born, in an act of courage and love the young mother provided her child a better environment by giving her to an adoptive family. That child was Pam Stenzel. She is the oldest of 8 children… 7 adopted…1 biological, and her extended family includes 38 adopted children in all.
Following her graduation from Liberty University with a degree in Psychology, Pam moved to Minneapolis, MN where she began to work with New Life Family Services, and young girls who were planning to place their children for adoption.
Pam was approached by a group of concerned parents, to develop a two-hour program for the Rally for Life 1992, a conference on sexual abstinence. She developed the program by mixing media and music, her own talk, and the testimonies of young girls. The response of students, parents and the community was so overwhelming that Pam began to get numerous requests to speak all over the Midwest.
In 1993, Pam's talk Sex Has a Price Tag was produced as a video. No one was prepared for the explosive response. Pam's speaking requests were so numerous that she decided to go on the speaking circuit full time. "Sex Has a Price Tag" has since been translated into 11 languages, won the Charleston Film Festival Award in 1995, and is currently used in the United States, Canada, Mexico, Central and South America, Australia, Ireland, Europe, the Ukraine, Romania, Poland, and throughout Africa.
In 1998 Vision Video and Gateway Films produced the film series "Sex, Love and Relationships" in Santa Monica, California. It won the Crown Award for Curriculum of the Year in November 1999.
Pam's current videography includes: "Time To Wait For Sex," "Sex Has A Price Tag 2000," "Character Matters" (a video for parents) "Sex, Love & Relationships," and "Take A Look In The Mirror" (a video for girls only).
She is also the Founder of Enlighten Communications, Inc., a organization focused and committed to the betterment of children and families in America and around the world. Enlighten offers a broad new model approach for those desiring to embrace strong character in today's youth. Enlighten empowers parents, youth leaders and educators to lead informed discussions on sexual abstinence and the benefits it produces.
Pam now travels both domestically and internationally, speaking to over 500,000 teens a year. Surprisingly many of her requests to speak come from teens themselves. She has been a guest on numerous national TV and Radio programs, including appearances on Fox News Network's "Hannity & Colmes Show," ABC Radio's "Sean Hannity Show," "The Dr. Laura Show," CBN's "The 700 Club," and ABC Television's "Politically Incorrect with Bill Maher."
Pam Stenzel is a dynamic, charismatic, and educated expert on sex, love and relationships. She understands the perils that young people face as they make adult choices, and is dedicated to reviving the character and integrity of today's youth.
Here is what my three children had to say after hearing Pam's presentation, Sex Has A Price Tag:
The Talk of the DayThe talk I heard was about abstinence. Teens in our times need to know that they have to keep sexual behavior inside marriage. I liked this talk a lot; Mrs. Stenzel made us laugh some times; a kid in 6th grade is not too young to hear what she has to say. I think we have to know what we should do; if we do not know what the right thing is, that means we may do the wrong thing. People need to know abortion is wrong or they may be convinced to kill their kids by abortion, and those kids could be the next Pope or a saints. Go to this talk with your kids.
Alyssa, age 12
Alyssa, age 12
Everyone Should Hear What She Has To SayPam Stenzel taught me about the importance of avoiding sexually transmitted diseases. She also told us to be careful of our actions. She handed out pamphlets that teach about the benefits of waiting to have sex. She discussed behavior that is right and behavior that is wrong. Mrs. Stenzel also told us how important it is to not be an easy victim. I recommend her presentation to everyone. Mrs. Stenzel has a website where people can get recordings of her best speeches. Everyone should hear what she has to say.
By Nick, age 14
By Nick, age 14
Pam Stenzel, Protector of Youth
Andre Bottesi, age 16
I recently attended an abstinence talk by the brilliant speaker Pam Stenzel. Mrs.Stenzel was very enthusiastic, comical at times, and informative. The talk inspired me to live a life that pleases God and makes me happy. Throughout the talk she mentioned surprising facts and stories of people Mrs.Stenzel has met with in the past. She has traveled all around the world and teaches people about abstinence. I was very lucky to attend her talk. Everyone should hear her talk, but even if you can’t because she hasn't been in your town, go to her website. Her website has many helpful things on it including an enlightening online course that I am starting. So please look at her work, she is very experienced and knowledgeable. Remember that this is for you and abstaining from sex until marriage it is what is best for you.
If you get a chance to see Pam in person, go, and bring everyone you can with you. If you can bring her to your community, do it, and be sure to invite everyone. Pam delivers a message that no one should miss. No one.
God is at work in Pam Stenzel!